Game of Thrones Winner: “Dragonstone”

GUUUYYYYYYSSSSSSS!!!!! It’s Back! Winter is here, (well, actually it’s the butt crack of summer.) (And the AC in my house is busted.) (So, not really feeling, the “winter.”) and we’re back in Westeros, and Game of Thrones is back and are you excited? Because I am excited!

It’s time to pick a winner, and well, other things. We have some definite not winners, that’s for sure. The Freys? Not winners. Those people that lived in that house where Beric, Thoros and The Hound were hanging out, definitely not winners. Ed Sheeran? Maybe a winner?

Nah, really, I’ve picked my winner, after some thought.

Danerys Targaryen

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She’s barely in the episode, but it’s good stuff. Her walk through Dragonstone, barely believing that she’s finally in Westeros, let alone at the place of her birth is stunning. Her joy at finding Stannis’s war table, at her obsidian throne and her one line, “Shall we begin?” CHILLS, CHILLS.

Runner up is Arya, because, also chills (from when she poisoned the Freys, not from when she had a jam session with Ed Sheeran and his buddies. That was just weird.)

Missandei and Grey Worm Watch 

They’re behind their queen as always, and it’s the best. In other shipping news?

STOP TRYING TO MAKE TORMUND AND BRIENNE A THING SHOW.

Also, Gilly and Sam are adorable.

And I ship Cersei/Euron a little. I mean, it would be terrifying, but also kinda hot.

Sansa’s Agency Watch

Sansa. My love. My true Westerosi soul sister. You’re not going to get anywhere with Jon by telling him your father and brother were idiots (they were) and then comparing him to Joffrey. (She did take this back. Jon is nothing like Joffrey, what a stupid thing to say.) However, the way you are dealing with Little Finger is perfect. Keep doing that, with the cutting him down with your words, and refusing to make eye contact. That was good.

Arya Badass Watch

The whole first scene, with her wearing Walder Frey’s Face, was pure badass. It was really cool, and very quiet and interesting and yet brutal. Well done, Thrones. Less badass? Eating rabbit in the woods with Ed Sheeran. Why is Ed Sheeran in Westeros? I mean, is Tay Tay going to show up too? The scene was fine, and a definite reminder that Westeros is truly screwed up still, from The War of The Five Kings and other stuff…but seriously, why, with the Ed Sheeran? WHY???

Bran Stark’s Excellent Adventure

Bran and Meera are at the Wall. I assume that this is so that anyone gives a shit what happens at the Wall. Also so that he can eventually get to Winterfell, and all of the remaining Starks can give each others hugs.

#NotaStark

This is a new feature where I spend large chunks of the show shouting, “JON IS NOT A STARK ” at random characters. I mean he is, but he also isn’t. He never was he was Snow, a northern bastard, and as it turns out he’s a Targaryen. If they had twitter in Westeros, #notastark would be a thing, and since they now have Ed Sheeran in Westeros, I assume twitter is not far behind.

Sam’s A Ravenclaw (Or maybe a Hufflepuff….)

This new feature will talk about Sam’s days at Hogwarts…I mean The Citadel. He spends a lot of time clearing bed pans and we get a montage of it and its gross, but interesting. Anyway, he talks to one of the Maestars about the end of the world, and we get a monologue about how it’s not the end of the world, so Sam steals some books, learns that Dragonstone is built on a mountain of dragonglass and sends Jon a note.

Oh and who just so happened to move into Dragonstone? Dany! Who needs a whole mess of Dragonstone real fast? Jon! You know who needs to meet? And then get married? And then bone? Jon and Dany! (Not necessarily in that order.)

Oh, also he takes care of people with Greyscale, and one of the is totally Jorah, like, they didn’t even try to hide it.

How Long Until Jaime Snaps?

Well, the death of his last child didn’t do it. Nor did Cersei flirting hard with Euron Greyjoy. Nor did learning that Tyrion is on Dany’s side now.

But this guy has very few straws left on the camel’s back. Something’s going to happen soon.

Other Pop Stars I would Like to see in Westeros:

Taylor (always), Lady Gaga, Lorde, Drake, Justin Timberlake, Any of The Living Jacksons But Especially Janet, Adele, Michael Buble.

Winter Is Here

Not to get overly gushy or anything, but OhMiGod OhMiGod You Guys! Game of Thrones comes back on Sunday.

While it’s a short visit to Westeros (only 7 episodes, although I’m choosing to think of it in terms of the two 7 episode seasons actually giving us 4 more episodes than one 10 episode season would, it’s still hard to stomach the abbreviation.)

I’ve spent a large chunk of my summer trying NOT to obsess over the fact that Game of Thrones wasn’t back and now it’s coming back and OMG I’m so happy that it’s back.

What’s going to be weird is I’ve lost some of my sounding board for the show. Mary and Joe have moved across the country and into a different time zone, so even discussing the show with them is going to be delayed, I will now rely on you, trusty blog folk, even more to flail over episodes with me.  But, since it’s been longer than usual, and because I’ve been avoiding it I haven’t rewatched the show as I usually do leading into the new season, let’s consider where we’re at:

Starks:

Jon has been declared The King In The North, and Sansa appears to be the power behind that. Little Finger (BLEH) brought the Knights of The Eyrie to save their bacon, and has declared that he wants the Iron Throne and Sansa as his queen (TRIPLE BLEH). Jon has banished Melisandre, and he and Davos are all set to shift everyone’s attention from King’s Landing to North of The Wall, where the White Walkers continue to grow in power.

Oh, also, Jon is actually the son of Lyanna Stark and Rhaegar Targaryen, and is possibly, if Lyanna and Rhaegar were married the true heir to the Iron Throne, a prime candidate to be The Prince That Was Promised, and will, if all badassness is to be fulfilled, become the rider of one of Dany’s dragons. (Probably the one named for his father.)

Or he’ll die, because George RR Martin.

Arya has begun her vengeance quest. We’ll see how that goes. Bran is officially the Three Eyed Raven now, I think?

Lannisters:

Cersei is on the Iron Throne, all her kids are dead, Jaime likely won’t put up with her shit much longer and The Sand Snakes and The Tyrells are coming for her. I want few things in this story more than Jaime killing Cersei and then himself. It feels narratively necessary.

Tyrion we’ll get to later, but yeah.

Daenerys Targaryen, Stormborn, Queen of The Seven Kingdoms & Mereen, Breaker of Chains, Khaleesi of The Great Grass Sea & Mother Of Dragons

Khaleesi is headed for Westeros, everybody say WOOO!!!! She’s got a fleet of Greyjoy ships, as well as the ships of the slavemasters, she’s got a crap ton of Dorthraki and the Unsullied on her side, plus she’s got the council of Tyrion Lannister and Lord Varys and Dragons.

We’ve seen pictured of Dany and Jon together, but whether that’s because they have scenes together or Emilia and Kit were just having a chat remains to be seen. BUT OH BOY do I want those two unsmiling hardasses to meet up and scowl at each other.

People Who I Think Are Going To Die

I mean, besides everyone? I do not think that Davos is long for this world, The Lord of Light and Melisandre as his emissary are probably not going to let his rejection stand.

Cersei, as I’ve explained and Jaime after her.

Jorah, also probably a goner, which is a bummer.

People Who May Live But Who I Don’t Think Things Will Work Out So Great For

The Good Greyjoys: I just don’t see things working out for Yara and Theon. Euron is supposed to be the most sadistic and terrifying villain we’ve seen yet, according to Martin, and he’s been thwarted by his niece and disgraced nephew, which I do not think he will take well. Also, it’s not like, out of the question that Arya: Spirit of Lady Stoneheart decides that Theon’s redemption is bullshit and murders the crap out of him.

Sansa: Too much went Sansa’s way last season. It was awesome, don’t get me wrong, but she’s long overdue for a large scale setback that is also completely horrifying.

Dany & Jon: Look I want things to work out for these crazy kids. I want them married, ruling Westeros and defeating The Others with dragonfire. BUT, this is Thrones. Martin’s never met a fantasy trope he didn’t subvert, castrate, rape, murder, feed to dogs and then set on fire. Secret son of the king, turned reborn chosen one and exiled princess returning to her true throne 100% qualify as the kind tropes he loves to stomp all over. Thus, I fear that our beloved Prince and Princess Who Were Promised are likely to wind up dead in the snow, their eyes turning blue, servants of the Night’s King. Sam and Tyrion will likely avenge them. Martin likes them a lot. A little too much, frankly.

People I will Miss Very Much This Season

Margaery Tyrell. King Tommen The Adorable. Ser Barristan Selmy. Shireen Baratheon. Stannis Baratheon. Hodor. The Faceless Man/J’Quen H’Ghar. The High Sparrow.

People I Will Not Miss At All And Thank God They’re Finally Dead/Not Involved Anymore

Walder Frey. Loras Tyrell. Ramsey Bolton. Myranda. The Fucking Waif. Every Single Character In Mereen Who Wasn’t Directly Allied With Dany.

Shipping Things I Want

Yara/Dany

Jon/Dany

Dany/Anyone (Seriously, I ship her with the whole world)

Brienne/Jaime

Shipping Things I DO NOT Want

Brienne/Tormund (DIIIIEEEEE IN A FIRRRREEEEE)

Dany/Tyrion (OK, so there’s one exception I don’t want her with)

Sansa/Anyone

Funny Thing That Happened To Me This Weekend

So on Saturday, my friend Owen mentioned that he started that show and that he’s halfway through season 2 and he hopes that Robb Stark doesn’t get corrupted by his new found power. He asked me if this happens and I half laughed/half cried, “No, Robb does NOT in fact corrupted by power.” Then he said that he didn’t I think that Robb should be the king, to which I replied, “Well, even at the point you’re at no, because I don’t think there should be a king, there should be a queen.”

Then he kept prying about what happened to Robb and I explained that this kind of conversation gets people mad at me, and he said he doesn’t care about spoilers, and everyone who’s watched the show said pretty much in unison, “OH NO, you care about this.”

Because there are spoilers and not caring and then there’s having someone wreck the Red Wedding for you.

Anyway, I told him if he wanted my thoughts, he was free to come read the thousands of words that I’ve written here about the show.

And there are more to come.

Guys, it’s back on Sunday.

Winter is Here.

Deconstructing Defenders: Daredevil: Season 1: Episode 13

Alright! We’ve made it through season 1! Here’s a thing I learned: Not great on a week to week basis. Not as great I should say. It’s still better than Arrow. But this season has fewer ninjas. We’ll see in season 2 if I still feel that way. (Spoiler Alert: Probably. Arrow doesn’t have The Punisher. It does have Diggle though.)

Anyway, let’s talk about the episode.

daredevil

Episode 13: “Daredevil”

Opening at Ben’s funeral is a gut punch but the scene between his wife and Karen is lovely. Although absolving Karen’s guilt kind of annoys me because, I’m really convinced that Karen might be a monster? Like, I know it’s not her fault that culture has programmed writers to force female characters to behave like manipulative crazy people in order to get anything done, but UGH, she’s just the worst.

Claire is the best.

Claire is not in this episode.

Anywho, Nelson and Murdock get back together to track down the detective who has all of the information on Fisk and they eventually take down his whole opperation, everyone is happy about it, except Vanessa, obviously, because your husband getting arrested while his criminal empire crumbles around you is not a good look.

Anyway, then we get to the last twenty minutes of the show which are the best part anyway. While he’s in custody, Fisk makes this amazing speech about the good samaritan. (Daredevil, Catholic to the last!) and says the amazing line, “I am the ill intent,” and breaks out. Luckily Daredevil shows up in a his awesome new suit and they have the greatest fight in the history of fights.

Not quite, but it’s a good one. And I really, really love that suit man. I think it looks cool as a first drafts of superhero suits go. I like that you can tell it’s a first draft. Anyway, I also like the difference between their fighting styles and how Matt winds up on top this time. Fisk is all brute force and Matt is all nuance and ninja flips and a about landing the right punches. The contrast really does make the whole thing magnificent.

Overall Analysis of This Season

Even pacing it out and thus noticing more of it’s problems, and realizing that it’s leading lady is just a horrible monster person, I still think this is a really good hour of television. The Hallway fight is still incredible, and Vincent D’Onofrio is still the anchor that keeps this whole thing from spinning insanely out of control. (As we shall see, in season 2.)

I do love the ending, but the middle is kind of tough and wheel spinny, still cool and masterfully performed.

Next we’re on to Jessica Jones, which is widely considered the best of this series, and I’m not convinces their wrong. (But Luke Cage is really fucking good you guys.)

 

Game Of Thrones Winner: Emmys!

So, this timing worked out almost perfectly! I didn’t know exactly what I was going to slot in here yet with there not being any more Game of Thrones to deal with.

But luckily, “Battle of The Bastards” quite rightly cleaned up, winning for best writing, best direction and then the show getting best drama. Honestly, this past season earned it. And while I still hate that Sophie Turner wasn’t nominated, and it was a bummer that Lena Headey, Maisie Williams and Emilia Clarke didn’t win, nor did Peter Dinklage of Kit Harrington.

But overall, it was a good win, and seeing David Benioff and D.B. Weiss hearfeltly thank the people that made “Battle Of The Bastards,” the truly amazing bit of television that it was.

So congratulations to my favorite show and here’s hoping I figure something out to put into this slot soon! (And something in One Tree Hill’s slot, as I’m rounding third base on that project too!)

Valar Doharis.

Game Of Throne Winner: “Mhysa”

OK, so it’s the finale, and I’m giving an unconventional win! This week, I’m giving the win over to Gendry.

gendry-still-rowing-game-of-thrones

After learning that Melisandre and Stannis intend to burn him, Davos sticks the kid in a rowboat and sends him off. So, because he gets to live and it starts everyone’s favorite GOT meme, Gendry gets the win!

Runner up is Roose Bolton, I guess. Whatever.

Missandei And Grey Worm Watch

They’re behind Dany in her “Mhysa” moment, so there’s that. In other shipping news, Gilly names her baby Sam, and Jon and Ygritte have the most awkward breakup in the history of time. But he does say that he really loves her, so there’s that.

Sansa’s Agency Watch

Sansa is still not being raped by Tyrion! She’s also making adorable revenge schemes for people that are mean to them. Also, Shay tells Varys that she’d do anything for Sansa, but it’s still, like, not a great set up for her. (Very true)

Arya Badass Watch

Arya and The Hound kill some guys who were bragging about their part in the Red Wedding. It’s ridonkulously badass.

Bran Stark’s Excellent Adventure

Bran meets up with Sam and Gilly and they all talk about the White Walkers.

Tywin Schools Joffrey

“You just sent the most powerful man in Westeros to bed without supper” Seriously, this rewatch has made me really miss Tywin’s witty, terrifying presence on the show.

OK, you guys, that’s it. I’ve now declared winners for EVERY EPISODE THAT EXISTS. And we’re not getting anything new until June. It’s going to be a long wait, and I might do something with the books in the meantime, but I’m not sure what that’s going to be yet!

Valar Morghulis everyone.

 

Game Of Thrones Winner: “The Rains Of Castamere”

Do you know how long I put off watching this episode again? A whole week of knowing I had to watch it and just not being about to do it. Also a year. I friggin waited a year to watch this season to avoid the Red Wedding.

Anyway, I have to pick a winner.

It’s Dany, I guess, because Daario, Jorah and Grey Worm take Yunkai for her. Good for you Dany.

Game-of-Thrones-Season-3-trailer-has-finally-arrived

Runner up goes to Roose Bolton, because he gets the best line, “The Lannisters send their regards.” And he’s married to Fat Walda, and we’re years away from her getting eaten by dogs, so there’s that.

This part of the show really is just no fun for anyone though.

Grey Worm and Missandei Watch

Grey Worm storms Yunkai with Jorah and Daario. Missandei is around but doesn’t do much.

Sansa’s Agency Watch

Sansa’s not in this episode, but she’s in King’s Landing, all, not being raped by Tyrion. So she’s in an OK space for the moment.

Arya Badass Watch

This is a tough episode for Arya. It’s not as bad as her chapter in the book, where I was sure that she was dead too. But still tough. She weathers it though. Hitting a dude in the face with a wagon wheel, and watching those Stark Men and then Grey Wind get killed. She’s a badass, end of story.

Robb Is A King And Kind Of Bad At It

Ah, so ends, Robb’s reign as the worst king ever. He has a plan to invade Casterly Rock, but him being a dumb butt and marrying Talisa all comes home to roost because his being a bad king gets everyone murdered at The Red Wedding.

Except Edmure who gets to marry the one hot Frey girl that Robb would have married if he weren’t such a colossal bone head.

Bran Starks Excellent Adventure

Bran learns how to Warg! He wargs into Hodor and then into Summer. He saves Jon from the Wildlings who are trying to kill him. He also sends Rickon to the Umbers. DON’T DO IT!!!!!!!!

Cosplay Corner: Sansa’s Done! ALSO Sailor Moon!

Hey everyone! This week I got my cosplay stuff together and, most importantly, I got my Sansa costume for New York Comic Con done! I still might tweak it, but if I don’t get to that, I’ll be perfectly happy to walk the floor in it.


And then came the big project of the week. Lora, (check out her instagram), recruited some fun peeps into doing closet cosplays of various Sailor Scouts. I got Moon (Mars was taken, so I volunteered for Moon or Venus, Lora gave me Moon.) My mind came to life trying to figure out what to do.

I wanted not just to recreate the Sailor Fucqu, but to put together an outfit that recalls Sailor Moon’s looks, while also being something that Usagi would wear in civilian mode. I put a lot of thought into this.

So, I’m wearing my blue shirtwaist dress, and white cardigan and pink flats. I went with a red belt. And then of course the hair. I put it up into little buns, a style that I perfected doing quick and dirty during a production of Godspell. I kind of wish I still had my long hair, because then I could have done the pigtails, but I think the buns get the idea across.