Crisis Management: Batwoman, Supergirl & The Flash Week 5, Arrow Week 4

This week we got a teaser, the most important part of which was seeing Brandon Routh is that super dope Kingdom Come Superman costume.

He looks really really good. Also, on Saturday, Aless and I expressed our annoyance that Michael Rossenbaum turned down being in Crisis because “they didn’t have a script yet,” which like, does he need a script? He makes a speech about “destiny” and “the thin line that separates heroes from villains,” and then Welling looks off into the distance with his face scrunched like he smelled a fart. Cut. End of Smallville portion of the crossover.

Anyway, this week’s episodes, let’s talk.

Batwoman Season 1, Episode 5: “Mine Is A Long And Sad Tale”

We finally learn how Beth became Alice. After the car accident a disturbed loner who’s abused son needs a friend, so he kidnaps Beth. After a near miss where Jake and Kate fail to find her, Beth and John, the mysterious Mouse, latch on to each other and Alice In Wonderland to escape the hell that they’re stuck in.

Alice tells her story to Kate, who is trying her best to understand what’s going on and also doing that superhero thing where her failure to save someone close to her even under pretty reasonable circumstances becomes the defining moment of her entire life and mission to fight crime.

Meanwhile, a frustrated Mary gets drunk and shows up to Kate’s office to confront her about how she’s a good person and Kate’s fixation on Alice, her “real sister” is hurtful. The reasoning for the scene is only OK, but an at the end of his rope Luke having to deal with Drunk Mary is awesome.

Oh, also Jake does manage to save Kate from Alice, but it’s too late for Alice who’s committed to Mouse as her new family, rather than the people she feels failed her.

Supergirl Season 5, Episode 5: “Dangerous Liaisons”

Kara loops new guy William (ehhh) into The DEO’s search for Leviathan, under the auspices of investigating Andrea. They are bonding, I am reminded of how much I miss Mon-El.

Alex and Kelly meanwhile are coming up on their “date-a-versary” whatever the hell that means, but it is an excuse for them both to realize that their scary dangerous lives are just all the more reason to further committ and also ride motorcycles together. (Seriously, did someone look at Alex’s entire life and just say, “she’s great! It’s all great! How can we make it even gayer?” I’m not complaining. Just saying.)

Meanwhile, Kara and her cool pants and neat bangs, and J’onn fight an assassin with Doc Ock arms who it turns out is (GASP) controlled by Leviathan who are, if you missed it, coming.

Oh, also Andrea’s creepy VR contacts launch and I know this is going somewhere Leviathan related, but for the moment it’s stupid and unfocused and it’s really hard for me to care.

Also, Lena tricks Malaf’a’ak, and now she’s studying his brain. I wish this had gotten more screen time.

The Flash Season 6, Episode 5: “Kiss Kiss, Breach Breach”

Breacher is back! YAY! I love Danny Trejo.

Of course he’s back because Gypsy is dead, which boo. She was murdered and The Collectors think that it was Cisco. OH NO!

Cisco and Kamilla and Breacher go about solving Gypsy’s murder, and Cisco doesn’t think he can do it. He also makes a Barry AI, which is adorable. Barry and Iris are on vacation, and I know that the Barry-light episodes is so Grant Gustin can film his Crisis stuff, and the show is doing OK by it, and we only have a few more weeks, so I’m hoping Barry gets some fun things to do in the back half of the season.

Anyway, they solve the murder and it was Echo, who is an alternate Cisco. DUN DUN DUNNNNN. Anyway, Cisco clears his name but does have to live with the idea that Gypsy died thinking he killed her. But he and Kamilla say I love you! Yay!

Frost confronts Ramsey and he offers to turn her into a blood monster. She passes but confirms his evil-ness. Ramsey is actually a pretty fun big bad, and I especially like that his connection is through Caitlin and Frost, rather than Barry’s future.

Joe and Nash (our new Wells) get stuck in the sewers below Central City, looking for The Monitor. We’re still not sure why Nash is looking for the Monitor, but Joe doesn’t care, because you know, it’s Joe, he’s just looking to bond/protect his family. He explains that the current need for faith in his life is that Barry’s death won’t be in vain. It’s a good scene because Jesse L. Martin and Tom Cavanaugh are incredible. Even if it’s a little contrived getting them to be alone together is always welcome.

Arrow Season 8 Episode 4:

I love when Arrow gets on it’s high horse about murder. It’s so much cognitive dissonance since the initial episodes of the show were just Oliver running around murdering people, a habit he has not really broken. Oliver still murders people pretty regularly. 

Anyway, this week’s “Don’t Murder” lesson goes to Mia. Everyone gets really cool, really quick about the future kids showing up. It’s weird but they’re dealing with a bunch of weird stuff anyway, so they all just kind of roll with it. (It’s weirdest for Connor since Dif and Lyla haven’t adopted him yet.) Mia, William and Connor agree not to reveal the future to their parents, especially Rene and Dig, who might not be cool about the whole “JJ murders Zoe” situation. Eventually everything comes out though and they all brood at each other.

Mia though is definitely up for killing CURRENT (5 year old) JJ in order to save FUTURE  (not 12 year old) Zoe. Laurel tells her that murder is always a bad plan. (Again, Laurel murders people kind of a lot) and Oliver tells Mia he wants them to be a family.

William is thrilled to be back in the life he voluntarily vacated at 12, which is annoying on a plot level but adult William is so damn cute, that I excuse it. He also comes out to Oliver who reveals that he was aware of William’s sexuality but wanted to give him time and space to come out on his own, and hates that they never got that time. Anyway, the episode ends with Dig and Conor doing sword training, The Queens eating grilled cheese sandwhiches and Rene running for city council, while agreeing to let Dinah train Zoe.

Oh also, the Minitor recruits Laurel to betray Oliver and get her Earth back.

I’m guessing this isn’t going to be that straightforward.

No Black Lightning this week. And hey! Tomorrow The Mandolorian premiers! I’m still thinking I’ll stick with Mondays for Crisis Watch and do Fangirl Loves Star Wars on Wednesday or Thursday. We’ll see.

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