Hey! I found something for the Monday spot!
So, for a bit of background. My family has been watching Once Upon A Time together since it’s second season. Which, incidentally is about the time that the show stopped following any kind of internal or external logic. But we still watch and we still try to understand, although, there’s really not much point. (Remember when Emma’s foster mom was also Elsa and Anna’s aunt or whatever?)
But, we truly love the show, and True Love conquers all, this is a consistent rule on Once Upon A Time. You know, unless you’re Regina, in which case, true love just causes your boyfriend to die in the underworld and possibly have his soul obliterated because the only actual rule of this show is that Regina is not allowed to be happy. Ever.
So, I’m going to ask questions, some every episode, some just because they just come up
Who’s The Dark One Right Now?
It’s Rumplestiltskin. I honestly couldn’t remember if Emma and Hook were still co-dark oneing it up, but it’s Rumple. He’s made some sort of deal with Mr. Hyde (yeah, that’s a thing…) to wake Belle up from her sleeping curse and save their baby, who pretends to be Morpheus, the god of dreams (and Neil Gaiman comics…but not.) to save Belle also. Anyway, they’re broken up right now, because she is awake, and she is also sick of his shit. So, yay?
What’s Emma’s Problem?
At the moment? She’s got hand tremors and is having visions of a sword fight where she gets killed. Oh, also, all the saviors (yes there have been others, and one of them was Aladdin!) tend to see their own deaths. And there’s a weird creepy oracle girl, who tells Emma she can’t run from this or fight it.
Lady, she dragged her boyfriend back from the underworld. So, you know, get bent.
Why Can’t Regina Be Happy?
At the moment? Zelena had a feather from one of Robin’s arrows but she lost it before she could give it to Regina. Also, she ripped out half of her personality and presumably killed it. But she didn’t actually kill it, The Evil Queen is hanging out at Zelena’s house making Appletinis.
Which no one has drank since like 2009, but sure, fine, whatever.
Do Charming and Snow have anything to do?
Nope. Well, Snow talks to Regina about hope being a choice, but still, not really, no.
How old is Henry exactly?
Yet another year has passed in the real world, and Henry is another year older and it does not appear a lot of time has passed, like, on the show. So, yeah, that’s a thing. He’s also really only in one scene here, where he tells Regina that Robin is gone and she should give up. (Nice, kid, really. You’re the writer, why isn’t your mom allowed to be happy?)
Did We Meet Anyone New?
Well, we met The Oracle, “Morpheus” aka Rumple/Belle Baby, Jafar (now being played by Not-Sayid from Lost, as he was on Once Upon A Time In Wonderland), and Aladdin. Plus a bunch of faceless extras from “The Land of Untold Stories” which is where Jekyll and Hyde came from, and it’s Steampunk fab and all.