Hoo, boy, we got a turn here. Ned is dead. Sorry about the twenty year/five year old spoiler there.
Back when I started this, my friend Kevin recommended giving this win to Ned. Because he’s actually better off. While I think that’s a decent idea, rewatching this episode, there is a clear, super duper clear, winner. And that winner is Jorah Mormont.
Jorah does his job to the max this episode, protecting both Danerys and Drogo from the blood riders wanting to seize power away from them. He also keeps trying to get Dany to leave the Khalasar, and she won’t, and he was probably right about that. I mean, yes and no, because we all know that if she’d left there’d be no dragons.
And then everything would be worse.
Runner up goes to Shae! Because we met her and she’s starting her pretty sweet life for a hot second, as Tyrion’s mistress, courtesan, thingy. Their relationship is complicated and wonderful and I’m really excited to get into it.
Missandei and Grey Worm Watch
I don’t even have a line to draw this episode, except for that Missandei probably would have at least tried to talk Dany out of all of these dumbass decisions she keeps making here. Although probably not. Grey Worm would have fought with Jorah though, and their victory would have been even greater! I was really impressed by Jorah this week you guys.
Sansa’s Agency Watch
No agency for Sansa this week. Her stupid plan to get Ned to stupid confess ends with stupidness and Ned dying. She also screams a lot while her father gets his head cut off. It’s hard to watch, and it’s hard and shitty.
Arya Bad Ass Watch
Arya catches a pigeon! It’s pretty great. We should all be really excited about Arya catching animals to feed herself. She also tries to charge at Ser Illyn who will be quite shortly cutting off her father’s head. Oh, she also betrothed to Walder Frey’s son, but we all know that this goes nowhere.
Who Was Jamie a Dick To?
Jamie was a dick to Robb and Catelyn! They captured him and he got all sassy, and also challenged Robb to single combat. Robb turned him down, because he hasn’t become a complete moron.
I’ve got to admit that watching this episode got put off because literally all I want to talk about is Straight Outta Compton. I barely care about anything else, and a lot of cool stuff has been happening in pop culture lately. Anyway, I got the episode in. Yay!