My Cliche Rom-Com Throw It All Out There Confession

I’ve been actively trying to date a lot lately, which is hard for me because it requires me to actually go on dating sites which is the worst, talk to people I don’t have an immediate introduction to, which I am bad at, and then follow through on going on dates, which means not hanging out with my friends, a majority of whom are already in relationships and therefore, don’t want to hang out in a loud club or bar and watch me talk to guys.

I really can’t blame them for this. It’s pretty awful, and probably boring for them.

Like 9 times out of 10, it’s pretty boring for me too.

A few years ago over on Confidently Catholic, back when that was a thing, a wrote a piece called “A Single Girl’s Prayer.” This piece is in that vein but more pop culture-y. You know that moment at the end of Notting Hill, “I’m just a girl, looking at a boy…” you know what I’m talking about. It’s a good device at the end of a romantic comedy to have these beautiful speeches that define the love story and often times it comes in this long rambly confession as to what the person is looking for.

This is mine.

If you’re going to fall in love with me you should know that I don’t care if a song is “good” or “bad” if I can dance to it and it’s about girl power. You should know that when I drink tequila I can get a little combative. I will argue with you about pointless crap for hourss, and I’ll be right and you’ll be wrong and I will think about it for years afterward. I’m going to ask you to cosplay Green Arrow when I’m doing Black Canary, and if you say no, I’m going to pout about it and then I’ll make passive aggressive comments the day that I’m dressed up. Be prepared to watch Doctor Who, a lot. Or don’t watch and be prepared to smile and nod anytime we’re around my friends. Also bone up on your Batman. If you haven’t seen Batman: The Animated Series, get ready to watch Batman: The Animated Series.

I sing a long to the radio, I hate wearing make up, I love wearing short skirts. I celebrate a time of year called “costume season,” followed shortly after by “food coma season,” I read too much, and I’m bad at chatting. I’m going to space out and I’m going to pretend I know more about sports than I do. I’m going to say that “I don’t want to drink on weeknight’s anymore” as I drink a bottle of wine on a Tuesday. (Not every Tuesday)

But I hope that you fall in love with me, because I’m also great. I laugh a lot, I get really enthusiastic about the things and people that I love. And you could be one of those people. I will love you, I will stand by you. I’ll open you up to the magical world of musical theatre. You’ll meet my friends and family, who are great.

Please, because, I’m tired of dating sites. I’m tired of small talk. I’m tired of speed dating and telling asking my friends if every guy they bring around is single. I’m tired of it.

I just want to be in love. Is that so hard?

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