When Frank Met Olivia: A Romance of Destruction

As I finished up House of Cards,  I started thinking about the other Washington D.C. set dramas to set it up next to.

Of course I thought of The West Wing, but as I played out any scenario that set Frank Underwood, Claire Underwood and co up against The Bartlett Administration it ended with Leo McGarry whacked out on pills and scotch, Josh Lyman screaming at the sirens in his head and President Bartlett curled up in a rocking chair as Frank somehow managed to make his MS advance faster.

No the sunshiney optimism of The Bartlett Administration would never stand against the steamroller of Frank Underwood.

But Pope and Associates, from Scandal, that would be a showdown worth seeing. Seeing Olivia Pope take on Francis Underwood would absolutely be worth it.

It would start simply enough. One of the many people that the Underwoods burned would realize that they had something to gain. Maybe Christina Gallagher, she got pretty well screwed. Anyway, she seeks out Olivia, because she wants justice for the man that she loved.

This is an appeal that obviously appeals to Olivia, because in spite of her bad ass-ness, she’s totally a big mush. Olivia and The Gladiators begin digging and of course they find enough to start pointing fingers. Unlike Lucas and Janine, Olivia has Huck. So when Doug Stamhope shows up all threatening, I figure Huck will just lock him in a basement somewhere and start torturing him with pictures of Rachel and her lesbian lover playing on loop or something. And a power drill, but I think that’s a given.

Upon hearing that Doug disappeared, Frank would called President Fitzgerald Grant and begin threatening him with revealing all of the Olivia stuff. Once her boy got brought in, the gloves would be off, and Olivia would show up at his office and make a big eloquent speech about how he doesn’t even know what he’s started. She will bury him. She is Olivia Pope. Frank will laugh it off and play the innocent, and Olivia would smile, go home and drink a whole bottle of wine.

In the end it would be hard to say who would win, but I think because Huck would kill anyone who gets near Liv, she would win out. Doug would try, but he would not be able to keep up with Huck’s level of homicidal crazy. And I think it goes without saying that this would all go on while Millie Grant and Claire Underwood drank tea in fab dresses and made pointed bitchy comments at one another.

I mean obviously, that’s what was going to happen there.

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