Guess, what? It’s February, which means I’m not even violating my own arbitrary “only write about Man of Steel: Superhero Yahtzee once a month” by commenting on the latest rumor.
That rumor being that Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson, will be playing John Stewart in Man of Steel: Huh What?
Aside from this just reaffirming my belief that this movie is going to be a little bit crowded, this is one that I can’t quite wrap my head around.
It’s not that I don’t love The Rock. Mr. Johnson is a staple around our home, as he was the champ around the time that my brother was very into wrestling. Also, my parents and brother saw his classic first SNL appearance and it was all over. What I’m saying is, I’m a big fan.
But I don’t understand. I have no concept of how he’ll work as John Stewart, mostly because of his size. He’s so much bigger than Henry Cavill and Ben Affleck and he’ll dwarf poor Gal Gadot and it’s not going to make any sense. It’s one thing to cast 6’2″ Hugh Jackman as Wolverine, because, well, I mean, it’s not like he was towering over James Marsden’s Cyclops. John Stewart can’t be that much more of a physical presence than Superman and Batman. It doesn’t make any sense!
But fine, I mean, fine, whatever, I give up. I don’t think I understand this movie. I NO LONGER SMELL WHAT YOU ARE COOKING ZACH SNYDER!
Also, there is a chance that this is all just a rumor. I kind of hope that it’s just a rumor.