Today, you all are going to meet my friends Chrissy and Glenn.
We met in college. Chrissy was a year ahead of me, and Glenn a year behind (although we ended up graduating together because I did college the long way…) and Chrissy stuck around in our college town for grad school. I met Chrissy my freshman year, and Glenn my second senior year when Chrissy started dating him. Chrissy recently moved to New Jersey, and Glenn is still stuck in our sad college town finishing up his grad degree. But Chrissy moving here is one of the single greatest things to ever happen to me, and to you dear blog readers, because Chrissy and Glenn have way funnier things to say about pop culture than I do a lot of the time.
For instance the three of us went out for lunch yesterday. Our conversation meandered a bit (as such conversations are wont to do) but we definitely got in to some nitty gritty fangirl (and boy, in Glenn’s case) talking points. If you like my facebook page, you will see the “Does Robin wear galoshes” argument that took place yesterday. But here are some other gems of conversations.
Discussing Talia (of Batman) and why she’s important:
Glenn: In one of the animated movies, Ra’s explains to Batman that he was lied to, and told he could achieve immortality through his child. That’s why he had Talia.
Me: Yeah, but that dynamic is so weird there. Like how Ra’s is always trying to pimp Talia out to Bruce so that he’ll become his heir.
Chrissy: That sounds like an awesome dynamic!
Glenn: Yeah, it’s a little much for a kid’s show. Although Batman: The Animated Series is so dark and serious…I know you don’t like cartoons, but I think you’d like this.
Chrissy: Since when don’t I like cartoons?
Glenn: Well, like you said The Last Airbender was stupid.
Chrissy: I’m sorry, but that is stupid. He can only bend air? On Futurama, which is a cartoon, Bender can bend everything!
On how The Simpsons has done everything:
Chrissy: There are things that I didn’t know were real things that I knew from The Simpsons first.
Me: Like that South Park episode!
Glenn: Wait, what?
Chrissy: Butters, but he’s Professor Chaos at that point right?
Me: Oh God, yeah! Anyway, he keeps coming up with evil schemes and then it keeps getting pointed out to him that Mr. Burns already did that.
Chrissy: Or Bart.
Me: Right, and then I think Stan is all, “Dude, you can’t stress out about that. The Simpsons has done EVERYTHING!”
Glenn: Which season was that? I know it has to be later, because Professor Chaos comes way later.
On Nightwing and Robins and multi-verses (We talked about Batman a lot):
Me: I just really hope they make a Nightwing movie.
Glenn: They have to. I mean, Blake could become Batman, but it would be better as Nightwing, and I think everyone knows it.
Chrissy: What is Nightwing?
Me: He’s a superhero.
Chrissy: Fine then, who is he?
Glenn: He’s who Dick Grayson, the original Robin grows up to be. There were three Robins, Dick Grayson, who became Nightwing, Jason Todd, who died, and Tim Drake, who is still Robin?
Me: He’s Red Robin now, and Damian Wayne, Bruce’s kid with Talia is Robin.
Chrissy: Wait, they have a kid? How do they have a kid?
Glenn: In comics there are all these alternate worlds and stuff.
Me: And in one version Talia and Bruce were married for a while and she got pregnant and left and then raised the kid and he eventually became Robin. It’s actually pretty stupid. But Nightwing is awesome.
On the name Cary (for men):
Chrissy: We should circulate some kind of petition for more people to name their sons Cary. I can only think of the two.
Me: And they’re both so suave and awesome!
Chrissy: Exactly! Like that Psych episode, where he’s an art thief, it took me a while to realize who he was, so I was like, “Why do I love you?”
(The Carys we were referring to were Grant and Elwes…and Elwes was the one who played an art thief on Psych.)
And finally, on discrimination in the Marvel Universe:
Me: Here’s what never made sense to me about the Marvel Universe, you have all these super heroes right?
Me: And most of them have super powers of some kind. But like Captain America is a hero, and Spider-Man is cool, but with the X-Men it’s all like…NO YOU MUST BE OUTCASTS FROM SOCIETY. And it doesn’t really make any sense. Like, why is one kind of superpower OK, but not another?
Glenn: Well, The X-Men were born mutants.
Chrissy: And Captain America happened because of good old fashioned American military experimentation! Actually, all of the Avengers are from either science going wrong or technology going awesome. Except Thor, who is an alien, god, thing…
Me: But he’s so pretty, so we ignore that.
Glenn: Yeah, so basically the rule is “No, you have to earn your powers through some kind of horrifying accident, or be Tony Stark, otherwise, you are terrible and we hate you!”
The fact that these kind of afternoons are going to become a regular occurrence in my life again makes me happier than anything in the entire world.